No, he is.

I second Double A's assessment. Get rid of him, or it could end up getting into sexual assault territory.

I know you didn't ask for my advice, but DTMFA. Dump the motherfucker already.

No, seriously, do it NOW.

There's another gift you can give him: the old heave-ho. And you don't even need to wrap it. Seriously, I'm worried for you if you stay with him. Be well, and do something loving for yourself today. I'd hug you over the Internet if I could.

Dump him. Sex isnt obligatory. He has a rapists view of sex and womens sexuality. You shouldnt even have him in your bed.

And theres never a reason to bear the brunt for his assholery by getting negative on yourself. Hes the useless one, not you. Ensure the message you send is clear - distance yourself from him.

You aren't useless, you're a PERSON. Not a sex machine. Not a toy. A PERSON. That makes you way more worthwhile than some object.

Please leave this jerk behind. It's attitudes like that that lead to and excuse rape. That's actually a dangerous situation.

Definitely dump the bastard. He doesn't deserve you, or anyone else. You should definitely feel disgusted, but not at yourself, you did nothing wrong.

Another vote for dumping the dude. That is a gift you can give your self.

If you live together and the lease is in his name, move your shit out and leave him a Fleshlight and a tub of lube and GTFO, if it's your place change the locks and toss his shit out on the lawn.

Not as a criticism here: But did you have any indications before this that he is unable to respect women? From the tone of his tantrum I think this guy has some real issues with maturity as well, he sounds like a little boy.

It's very frightening to think that this boy ( I can't call him a man with that sort of attitude) has this mindset that all you are is a body for him to screw whenever he feels like it. You are so much more then that and deserve someone in your life who is going to see you as a mind, body and soul and not just some hole!! You're worth more then that. You don't deserve to be treated like that. Kick his ass out the door!!

Ugh! I'm so sorry you had to put up with that. You aren't alone. My boyfriend sometimes gets petulant and whiney when I don't feel like getting him off. I've given him the speech about how I'm worth more than just sex and how I don't have to do anything I don't want and he just replies with "but I'd never make you do anything you really don't want. I'm just blowing off steam." So it comes down to "I won't force you to do anything, but I'll bitch about it unless you do." I just keep giving him subtle little doses of feminism and hoping it works.
OTOH, if you really think he only wants your body and will get angry if he doesn't get it, you should definately dump the jackass! He shouldn't put you in danger. You are worth more than he knows :)

I agree with the votes to dump this jerk and totally agree with Logrus' suggestions. He wants sex that badly, he can pay for it. You don't deserve that kind of treatment. No one does.

You mean ex-boyfriend, right?

While I'd love to jump on the bandwagon with a "Dump the bastard!" comment, I won't.

I'm not saying NOT to dump him either.

Obviously if you love him and are with him still, he has some redeeming qualities for you. However, now that you've seen this side of him, it's your responsibility to communicate to him that what he has said and how he recently treated you is unacceptable. You are a human being and deserve to be treated as such.

If he refuses to change, then you have to what you think are his good qualities against this VERY BIG bad quality, and make the decision to stay or leave. (I'd vote leave him if he refuses to change.)

I millionth the dumping.

Give him a box with a Fleshlight, a bottle of lube and the card of a rental agency, then show him the door.

Seriously, on the scale of Not Good to Good, this is in negative numbers.

This is ridiculous on his part, but really - props to you for recognizing that it's ridiculous bullshit. You are not worthless, get that kind of badness out of your life, and continue empowering yourself and those around you instead.

Everyone here is giving good advice, but I jsut want to chime in and say I know EXACTLY how you feel. I wasn't in a serious relationship, but rather playing around with a couple of different men. I liked them, and I thought they liked me--we had good conversations, and we had things in common, and I made them laugh, and we enjoyed each others company. But then I had some gynecological surgeries related to abnormal pap smears, and couldn't have sex for two weeks afterwards. I told my boys about this, and suddenly, none of them were as interested in me as they used to be--they either didn't return calls, or shortened our dates, or made excuses not to come over.

I was heartbroken. I thought they liked me because I was funny and smart and down to earth. No, they liked me because I had sex with them. It's a shitty feeling, thinking that the only thing you have to offer in a relationship is sex.

"You mean ex-boyfriend, right?"

Seconded!!! Be Strong, and stay true to the feminist beliefs I am sure you hold if you are posting on this site. Womyn are not objects, and you are a womyn!!!

A guy with those views is a lot for any one person to take on. Tell him what he said was wrong, and tell him why. And do NOT sympathize with him trying to excuse what he said, it's inexcusable.

Being in a relationship isn't supposed to make you feel useless. If it were me, I'd DTMFA. Someone with those views doesn't see women as full, separate, autonomous human beings, and you deserve to be treated like the fully autonomous human being you are.

Actually, I'm sorry, my comment came off a little prescription-y. You don't have to tell him anything if you don't want...I was just writing that advice from the position of what I would do myself.

But seriously, every human being deserves better than being told they're good for one thing and one thing only. I just hope knowing that will help you combat the feelings of being useless (because you're not useless!).

Ms. Blood, there are so many, many better men out there than this jerk. And I second Noah. Nobody who says something like that is a man. Men are grownups. This guy has the emotional maturity of a 3-year old. I say 3, because my friends' 4 year old, when I told him he'd have to wait until Saturday to come over, said, "well, okay, I'm disappointed a little, that's all, but it's okay."

That's right, a 4 year old has better manners and greater empathy than this jerk.

You're not useless.

my advice, though you didn't ask for any, is that you dump him. If you feel like doing him a favor, tell him exactly why you're dumping him so that if he has a shred of intelligence he'll change his attitude.

I think most people I know have had relationships end like this. its a good way to learn that not only are you not useless, but you can have a self-worth that doesn't have to do with some asshole's sexual appetites.

Just another voice saying: Dump the bastard!

wintermute: "You mean ex-boyfriend, right?"

BEAT ME TO IT.

Argh, please please please get out of that. It took me a year-and-a-half to figure it out. But you see it right here: he made you feel worthless. You are not worthless, you're beautiful =)

But don't let 23 crazy feministing posters tell you what to do. Figure it out for yourself (just don't take as long as TheBrawn... eeeek)

I know this has already been said but I'll say it again. Dump his ass, don't take any shit from anybody.

It's been said a million times, but seriously, really, truly, dump him, *and* stop talking to him, get him out of your space and your life. I'm not saying this simply because his comment pissed me off (although it definitely did), I'm saying this because I am actually somewhat afraid for you -- people do not talk like that, treat you like that, if they think of you as another human being. Actual people don't "owe" each other sex, ever. YOU don't "owe" anyone anything, and he doesn't have the right to even THINK of demanding it from you.

Is this real?
If so, I suggest you say good bye to him and avoid that person at all cost.

Do yourself a huge favor and dump the bastard. You owe him nothing.

Ugh, I hope you broke up with him. Not that everyone else hasn't already said it, but you are far too good for the likes of him.

Only thing you need to tell him is goodbye.

He's hidden it for long enough for you two to become involved, but now he's shown his true colours. Whatever redeeming qualities he may have shown before can very well just have been pretend and thus THEY are worthless. Not you. Never you.

Dump the fucker.

You are not worthless and useless!

Also, you didn't "deny him sex," you just refused to have sex when you didn't want to have sex. If he takes it personally, that's his problem and doesn't mean anything's wrong with you! Sex with someone else isn't a right, it's a privilege that depends on the other person's consent, after all.

Why does everyone seem convinced that VirginBlood (intriguing name) isn't just a troll who gets off on posing as a poor little woman who's being used and abused, and tricking genuine people into writing heartfelt responses to the situation? I'm skeptical. Perhaps this is why Jessica suspended the comments on VB's other post.