I'm with you. My boyfriend and I use condoms, and we've been in a monogomous relationship for over three years. I have been on the pill off and on over the years, but I don't like taking medication generally and don't like the way that the pill makes me feel. I agree that using condoms in a serious relationship is seen as strange, but it definitely works for us.

Here's a question: Who usually pays for the condoms? If you split it 50/50, I'm happy for you.

My spouse and I used condoms for PIV until we started trying to conceive. Hormonal BC does not agree with her. Since the little ones have been with us, we've used condoms for PIV, though she likes bareback and the spontaneity it offers, so now that the house is full, I'm getting a vasectomy this fall.

And here I thought I was strange-I really cannot tell the difference between a wrapped penis and a bare one. My partner and I use condoms as well, mainly because they are much cheaper than the pill when you don't have insurance. We've been together a year and a half, but we've only used condoms the past six months or so. They haven't broken yet, but if they did, I'd simply go get Plan B.

I don't have many friends in committed relationships, but the few I know are on the pill.

Oh holy cow, my beloved and I use the pill AND condoms. No babies for us, thank you!

I never really thought about it being weird. It's been par for the course in the relationships I've had since getting on the pill. Additionally, screw what other people think about condoms. What works for you and your partner(s) is what works.

My own partner and I have tried going without the condoms once or twice and even though I've been on the pill solidly for a long time now, we still got very paranoid waiting for my period to come.

It also has the added benefit of evening up expenses - I buy the pills, he buys the condoms.

As for the sensation thing, I always assumed that was just about the guy - who ever cared about the woman's pleasure, right? >.

I can't tell the difference either. My SO also says he doesn't notice as much.

I'm on the pill, so we don't always use condoms. But my sex life experiences have led me to partially understand why some people don't like them.

I've been with people who have, how shall I say this, wilted when it came time for the condom. They got embarrassed, which made everything worse, and, more than once, we had to call the PIV off. Some guys, when they don't find the condom sexy or they lose the fantasy in their head, can't maintain erections and they blame it on the condom.

Also, personally, I am just freaked out that the condom's thin latex is all that's preventing pregnancy for me. I've never had a condom break, but it's a lot of pressure to put on the thing. I like having condoms as my backup because I'm deeply aware of how my BCP taking is going (whether I'm on time with it, staying consistent, etc), and trust it more than I trust condoms not breaking, you know? Maybe I'm weird.

I've been on birth control since before I started dating my now fiance (three years ago) so we never used condoms. Last year I randomly started spotting so I stopped taking the birth control until I could see my doctor, and we had to start using condoms. He's the only guy I've had sex with so this was my very first experience with condoms (weird, huh?). It was a different feeling and I thought it actually felt really good. When people say that it feels better without a condom, I disagree. I think it's just that you get used to one way and changing it up is kind of exciting. Plus there are lots of different condoms to experiment with! :)

My partner and I also use the pill + condom combination. I know both are supposed to be pretty reliable but I want to be certain that I'm not going to get pregnant, so even 1/100 is a risk bigger than I'm willing to take.
The biggest problem with condoms is that they can be hard to get on properly. Sometimes they go on easily but those times that they don't . . . Does anyone else have this problem?

I have used condoms for many years now and I have never had one break. It isn't luck, it is knowing how to properly use one.

One thing I would like to bring up regarding condoms though is that fit matters! Because I work as a sex educator I go back and forth on this a little. If all you have is one of those crappy durex condoms that are free everywhere, then use it. But there is a difference in feeling and comfort with different brands and styles. For guys who have difficulty with one type of condom, they may have better luck with another type. Experimenting with different brands and styles can be fun too.

Condoms are still the best way to prevent disease transmission and pregnancy. When used in combination with the pill then it's about as good as it gets without surgery.

All of your "friends" who seem to be giving you grief about using condoms are either ignorant or assholes. Herpes and HPV rates among younger people seem to be on the rise. Hope they enjoy discolored lumps and sores on and near their genitals.

That having been said: Condoms are not awesome in terms of sensation. Someone said their lover can't really tell the difference. Well he's either the luckiest guy in the world or he's passing on a white lie because he does not want to potentially make someone feel under pressure to have no-condom sex. Don't get me wrong, sex with a condom is still pretty rad, but it's like having a plain hamburger on a plain bun compared to a double cheese burger with bacon and guacamole on a toasted onion bun with a chocolate shake and onion rings.

Logrus, careful with presuming that every man's experience is yours. Some uncircumsized guys don't like bareback because the foreskin and frenum can get sensitive rolling back and forth; some of us feel a difference but don't have a strong preference, and if some guy told me he prefers intercourse with a condom, I wouldn't call him a liar. Different people have different experiences.

I know women who say they can't tell the difference, and some who absolutely have a preference. I also know women who love anal and women who hate anal; I even know some women who (with monogamous partners) have a strong preference for bareback anal but don't especially care for vaginal.

Different people have different experiences.

"Here's a question: Who usually pays for the condoms? If you split it 50/50, I'm happy for you" - Alexandra

Actually, I'm a university student and he's not and my campus has an awesome program where they actually have like, 10 wonderful different types of condoms you can get for free. So for now, once in a while I head over to the health center and grab a bagful. But when I'm down south, away from Uni for the summer and my stash has eventually ran out, he does usually pay because I am very low on cash. I've been in a relationship with a fellow student, and we did split pay 50/50 for condoms.

Logrus - I'm not sure if it makes a difference when it comes to sensitivity if a guy is circumsized or not but if it does my partner isn't. Also, he said there isn't *much* of a difference to him, so to me that just says, yeah he may be able to tell, but not incredibly so that he has a strong preference, as Thomas says. I do know my partner is pretty sensitive. He actually prefers buying condoms with desensitizer.

Me and my boyfriend since three years also use condoms. I think they work great, we never have any problems (besides that time we got some with spermicide which gave me an allergic reaction)and frankly we are usually at home when the mood strikes so the whole spontaneity thing is not an issue. I don't feel much of a difference between wrapped or unwrapped either, but I guess my bf does but it's not an issue. And we split the cost of course :-)

Logrus commented at August 25, 2008 1:53 PM: "Don't get me wrong, sex with a condom is still pretty rad, but it's like having a plain hamburger on a plain bun compared to a double cheese burger with bacon and guacamole on a toasted onion bun with a chocolate shake and onion rings."

Now I wonder which burger sex with a dental dam is like, and which sex Hamburger with the Lot* is like.

* Vanessa Pike-Russell, in "Metzis Tasty Takeaway Hamburger with the lot - Australian style!", http://www.flickr.com/photos/lilcrabbygal/1017006114/ , August 5, 2007, said:

"An Australian hamburger with meat burger, tomato, beetroot, lettuce, onion, egg, bacon, pineapple, cheese and BBQ sauce

"Hamburger - $3.80 or with chips and drink $5.80

"Metzis Tasty Takeaway
Mackenzie Street (off Reddall Parade)
Mount Warrigal NSW 2528 Australia"

Ok, this may come as a big shocker to ya, but my husband and I prefer condoms at this point in our lives. We have been dating since 1991, married in 1999, had a baby early on in the 90s. I am 40-ish, he's older. After years on the pill, after turning 35, I made the decision not to take them anymore for health reasons. But, of course, we are both still fertile and a baby at this stage in our lives is definitely unwanted, and neither of us want to be sterilized. Condoms are the best choice for us, we shop around and have preferences for one brand over others, for sensations sake.

We keep some non-latex condoms around (I'm allergic to latex) but don't use them for PIV sex. But it is great to have them around.

Mina:

"Now I wonder which burger sex with a dental dam is like, "

It's a photograph of a hamburger that you eat when you're Tom Hanks on a desert island and a crate of Denny's menus washes ashore.

There is a very stupid and stubborn part of me that will never allow me to use a dental dam. May as well go down on a fleshlight.

"which sex Hamburger with the Lot"

Magical sex in a world with no unwanted pregnancy, no diseases, no bad breath, when you have sex farts it does not smell and it's funny but not distracting, gravity is a help and not a hindrance, there are no cramps, you can ask for anything without being afraid of freaking your lover out, and unlike eating that burger you're cleaner when you finish than when you started with no wet spot.