I faced a similar situation when I went down to Mississippi for school from my liberal Maine household. It's an entirely different breed of thinking down South. Women think if they aren't engaged by the time they leave school, they're old maids. I've seen women put up with utter bullshit becuase they're desperate to please men. When a girl marries a guy who once told her to "crawl in a hole and die" when she told him she was pregnant with his child in high school, something is seriously wrong with the world!

I was raised the same way. My parents made sure I knew prejudices were bad (though I've recently found out that he's homophobic, he never shows it around me--I'm bi, so maybe that's why) and that you don't hate on people for being who they are. So imagine my surprise with the internet and school. Oh boy.

My school's a weird mix of conservative and liberal views. Homosexuals and bisexuals are accepted, but women are second class citizens in most male views. No one rags on the girl who comes to class pregnant or with a kid, but talk of abortion is shouted down immediately.

I'm studying to be a math teacher and the closer I get, the more I dread it. My math teacher is an amazing woman, very strong and independent and when I think of the crap she probably faced to get where she is, I don't know if I can take it. My natural response to human stupidity is to literally beat some sense into the person(s). That's not really an option, though.

I wish you luck with your classes this semester. If they give you lip, remind them that you're the teacher and to drop your class if they don't like it. Then my solution would be to fail their asses if they didn't drop and still gave lip, but that's just me. ;P

Thanks for keeping it up Oksana! You are exactly right, if you don't challenge their thinking, who will?

I go to one of the odd bastions of neutral-slightly-liberal-leaning views in the southwest, the University of Tulsa. I originally thought it was quite conservative, but my more recent classes have been a wonderful and tolerant mix of both sides of any argument, and nobody has totally shouted down anything that can be logically defended.

I'm sure this isn't true in every class here, but I just wanted feministing readers to know that there is *some* hope in the middle of the country. =)

Aliceinreality, you should email me (tryptaminebutterfly at hotmail.com). I go to TU also!

I was just going to say that I've seen a lot of people's views change while I've been here. Higher level classes seem to generate a lot more thoughtful discussion. A lot of these kids come out of high school very sheltered so it is really good to have someone questioning that, even if you are a *gasp* feminist. ;) You can't reach everyone but I'm sure you will reach a few, and that's better than none! And if it makes you feel any better, Oksana, I thought I was a conservative myself until I got out into the real world, was taught the true meaning of words like "feminist", and realized I was actually a flaming liberal.

I had a very similar experience. I went to undergrad at a veeeery liberal and pro-feminist school in the northeast where every student was required to take at least one women/gender/sexuality class to graduate, so imagine my surprise when I got to grad school in the deep south and was teaching kids very similar to what you were describing. I actually changed the curriculum of my class (thankfully, I was able to do that, even as an MA student) to add a section on language, gender, and sexuality because I knew if I didn't make them think about it, they never would.

It's a scary world out there if you have to leave bastions of free thinking and go to really conservative areas. Most of the kids responded really well to feminist concepts, and I like to think that I encouraged these kids to pursue something they otherwise never would have.

I think that sounds like a great idea, the point of college is to question - everything if possible, to find out what you truly believe. However I know where your students are coming from -

I went into college thinking I was a Conservative Republican and (gasp) thought feminism was bad, that they were a group of extremists (that was about it, found out later I knew nothing of feminism really and then that I was one). I was also naive, like you and your students. When I graduated from highschool I didn't know that women everwhere in the US weren't getting equal pay, I didn't know racism was such a problem in some areas of the US (I grew up in a very diverse suburb), and I didn't know people at college would expect me to know what brand name shirt they were wearing. I didn't know a lot of things - because I was a highschooler, I had been exposed to only a few things and didn't know people could be SO different from the ones I did know (now I know better). While some highschoolers are more open thinkers and better at questioning their surroundings, some are not. You also have to consider the environment they grew up in, they may have been shielded from many things, should they be looked down on for that?

You should make your students question things - I'm all for that. Just remember that you once were naive too, just because you were unaware of how commmon being close-minded is doesn't make it better or worse then your students' own naivety. Lucky for me my college experience led me to change some beliefs, but more so it made me realize who I had always been - a libertarian feminist, I just didn't know it when I was 18.

The lack of respect is crazy to me. I am 19 and I have so gd much respect for teachers, I wouldn't have said anything offensive no matter what you took in college. It could be because I was raised by a feminist teacher- my mother- and so I imagine her everytime someone says insulting things. It's just not right.

Sarah,

I hate to say it, but being a young-ish-looking (I started TA-ing at 22) female TA really opens you up to all sorts of things you would never expect. I've had students say and do such inappropriate things to me and in front of me that they'd never dare with a male or older-looking TA. My first semester teaching, one of my students thought it was appropriate to address me as 'babe' in class. We had quite a discussion about that moniker, believe you me! Can you imagine that ever happening with a male TA (even with a more gender-appropriate nickname)?

Oksana...

That you for this post, it was an enlightening read of what I will no doubt encounter when I finally get into teaching.

I went to HS in UT, not the most liberal minded state I know. But my school (being located in the city) was open-minded and accepting. I was raised to be a liberal (and to think growing up I thought I was being raised to be normal!)--differences are good, quality is good, prejudice that harms/keeps down any group is bad, etc.

Then I went to college in some small backwoods hick-town in MD. Funny thing was, all the staff/professors where liberals, but the student population was majority right-wing, religious conservatives.

It was interesting trying to talk about race, privilege, gender, etc. with these "white, affluent, politically and religiously conservative students."

However, as someone else pointed out, I think it has a lot to do with age and experience. As I got to my higher level classes, the thinking gradually change, and world views were wider. In other words: Students actually began to think, wonder and question.

Don't give up (I need to know it's possible to teach them lol)--it's frustrating but although they may not show it, you're slowly adding new ideas and neural pathways to their brains. They're young; the young never thank you for learning lol.

Oh, one more thing: I'm an English major/Soc. minor. I found one of the best ways to approach a topic students will want to reject because they want to live in some fantasy world where all is good and perfect, is to hand it to them in the form of a narrative.

For instance, when talking about gender privilege, gender roles and how harmful those expectations are to both men and women, etc. a great book to have students read is Norah Vincent's "My 18 months spent as a man" (or something very close to that).

Instead of spouting theory, she approaches the topic from a strictly "this was my personal experience and I'm not lecturing you" stance. What's great about these books though, is that they reinforce the theory the students want to reject.

Basically I think, the memoirs/narratives are less threatening to students.

Just an idea. :-)

Thanks for the feedback, everyone! Teaching is such an adventure, and I'm so glad to have a place to share my thoughts and experiences--and to hear about all of yours. You kick arse.

You're all right (of course) about the students being at the beginning of the learning curve. And summer_time, I absolutely do agree that 18 is young. I look at that sea of babyfaces, and it's just so amazing how young they look. As smart and capable as my students are, they still have plenty of growing room--as we all do at that age. I'm just part of the frontlines of that process, hah! IiiiiiiiiiiiiiiNCOMING!

I'm just so excited to work with a new batch of students. Teaching is a joy, and I love my students. Even the Republicans. ;-)

And you're right on, Dvntwriter--Narrative is my first unit. Students roll a lot better with that at the start, especially during that scary first month of college.

This is a tricky thing to pull off. The professors who did the most to influence me did it by asking questions and leaving me to explore myself. The liberal mindset is, ultimately, about questioning, so it already lends itself to this sort of approach, but it is tempting to try to "correct" their views, which more often than not will prompt them to shut their minds, even if they parrot your views back at you in their papers in order to get a good grade.

I say this because of my own experience teaching freshman comp, and doing exactly what I'm warning against.

I'm a grad student doing women's history and the comments from students in history when you try to inject some gender into the discussion is just scary. Apparently women should only be mentioned in Canadian history classes when talking about suffrage, and that covers everything important.

I'm a senior in college and what I've realized is that once those kids get away from their parents and into an atmosphere where their so called "Beliefs" are challenged, they start to get a little more moderate. All they need is to get out of their parent's and community's grasps to figure it all out and realize that ole mom and dad don't know everything, and that yeah, society is really kind of fucked up.

I went to the University of Georgia. I'm not religious, conservative or southern.

The idea that I didn't get up and go to church every Sunday was wild to a lot of people. I had to repeatedly explain that I didn't want to join hands a pray before each meal (I tried to be as respectful as I could but goddammit, stop asking me when you know I don't want to). I had the Kerry/Edwards sticker ripped off my car and later had my "F the President" sticker keyed. I got dirty looks over the various political buttons I wore on my bags (pro-choice, anti-Bush, etc, nothing actually said "feminist" because I didn't identify with the word yet but my beliefs were feminist ones). I had a (female) roommate that called the Women's Studies department "the abortion building."

I got a low grade on a damn good paper I wrote for freshman English, which I think was because of the subject matter - I told this story from when I was in Paris and these people on my trip were appalled by all the blatantly sexual souvenirs (specifically a cute little monkey that had a giant penis pop out when you squeezed it) and how I thought they were hilarious and the conversation that followed where I attempted to explain cultural differences. Plus I used the word "fuck," though in my defense, I was quoting Ani DiFranco in an attempt to explain our different thresholds for innuendo.

I also got into a huge argument with people from marching band when we were in China. We'd gotten to this hotel that was supposed to be nice but was, in fact, disgusting - roaches and stained sheets and all that. I was among a small group who decided to forego dinner and help load our bags on the bus so we could transfer to a nicer hotel. A few of the other people were very loudly and blatantly bitching about the hotel and I said something like "you know, guys, maybe it would be best if we waited to complain about this place until we're outside or on the bus. We don't know who does and doesn't speak English and even if they don't they can probably tell what we're talking about by our inflection and body language." I thought I was very polite about it - I didn't tell them never to complain I just suggested we do it in private. They went off on me for "telling them what they could say" and how they expected a certain level of quality from these hotels (never mind the fact that it was an error and we were leaving) and how, while we had a huge portion of our trip covered by the department of the Chinese government that invited us there, they would have willingly paid so much more for this (two years later I'm still not sure why that's relevant) and I have no right to dictate what they should do. The real problem is that a) they were spoiled Atlanta suburbanites who have probably never been told 'no' before, b) they were younger than me - freshmen or sophomores while I was a senior, and c) only used to the southern way of doing things, which is not confronting anyone or speaking your mind. I also think they knew I was right and were lashing out because of it. I think that wound up being kind of off topic, but it has to do with deep south culture.

This comment is probably epically long, so I'll stop now.