Once upon a time
In a land far away
A beautiful, independent, self-assured princess happened upon a frog
As she sat contemplating ecological issues on the shores of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle
The frog hopped into the princess' lap and said "Elegant lady, I was once a handsome prince, until an evil witch cast a spell upon me. One kiss from you, however, and I will turn back into the dopper young prince that I am.
And then my sweet, we can marry and set up housekeeping in your castle with my mother. Where you can prepare meals, clean my clothes, bear my children, and forever feel grateful and happy doing so."
That night, as the princess dined sumptuously on lightly sauteed frog legs seasoned in white wine and onion cream sauce, she chuckled and thought to herself...
I don't fucking think so.
:-D
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Ms., you totally win the internet.
This is my new favorite fairy tale. Ever.
This is the best. I adore it.
:)
Haha, I like this. Can you turn it into an actual book?
There are actually fairy tales like this published by feminists. You should read Jack Zipes's anthology of feminist fairy tales. It's pretty awesome.
Love it - and I must have that book, Courtney.
I'm not sure if you're talking about the same anthology, but I remember reading a book called 'Don't Bet on the Prince' in my freshman year of undergrad.
LOL That's fantastic. I think that young women are still being trained to wait around and be swept off their feet by Prince Charming somewhat.
I remember reading alternative tales of the Wicked Witch of the West, Sleeping Beauty and Cinderella by this male author from New York I think..really awesome.
Mr. Zombie and I laughed and laughed when I read that last night. I'm going to email it to my friends and family now. Thanks for the lols! ;)
hahaha!
Best. Fairytale. Ever.
The Grimm bros. just got pwned.
This is love.
I know I've read this before. Where did you get it from?
Love it! I never knew anything could make eating frog legs sound appealing.
This made my friggin day.
i'm 95% certain that this comes from a book of politically correct fairy tales by james finn garner.
http://www.amazon.com/Politically-Correct-Ultimate-Storybook-Enlightened/dp/0765108674/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1219883507&sr=8-3
Haha, I've always enjoyed this one.
On the note of feminist fairy tales... When I was eight or nine I had a book from a series called "Girls to the Rescue." It contained short, exciting, fairytale-like stories from around the world, all featuring strong, intelligent heroines. There were girls winning jousting competitions, outsmarting ogres, saving the day, and occasionally capturing the hearts of princes, but with intelligence and generosity (rather than fairy dust and magic shoes). I loved those stories so much; they beat Disney movies any day.
If any of you have a young female in your life, seriously consider getting her those books. I found a link here on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Girls-Rescue-Tales-Around-World/dp/0671899791 But apparently they're also selling them on the NOW website as well! Awesome stuff.
Oh, and for younger girls, there's always "The Paper Bag Princess," (available here: http://www.amazon.com/Paper-Bag-Princess-Classic-Munsch/dp/0920236162 ) who saves the day and ends up ditching her rude, superficial, lazy prince to be. (He had the audacity to say she looked ugly and disheveled after she went up against a dragon to save him; that's definitely a DTMFA moment!)
Dissenting voice incoming:
That was gross and rather mean. :(
Yes!
haha
love that....
I always wondered what the prince did to the witch that made her turn him into a frog, rather than simply binding him?
Nothing Sacred, "Girls to the Rescue" were my favorite books as a young sprog. :D :D Which were your favorites? I don't think I can even recall most of them now, but I remember loving Chardae's thousand and one nights.
(Oh, and "Ella Enchanted" is another great feminist fairytale. Do not be fooled by the film and its stupid evil-uncle plot and superficial denunciation of racism. The book is infinitely better.
See, she's under a curse of obedience, and in the film, [SPOILER] she's been ordered to kill the prince, but she frees herself from her curse by telling herself in a mirror "You will not be obedient." In the book, she almost bites her tongue off trying not to answer yes to the prince's proposal when her stepfamily is telling her to say yes, because she knows they would be able to take advantage if she were queen. She breaks the curse by willpower.[/SPOILER]
It's a great book.)
That was awesome!
And I second the recommendation of the book Ella Enchanted and not the movie. I was very disappointed in Anne Hathaway, as I really like her as an actress and that movie was just so disappointing.
Wait a sec. You mean to tell me that those frogs legs I ate? I think I'm going to be sick! :-p
I own a copy of that book by James Finn Garner. It IS called Politically Correct Fairy Tales, and it IS freaking hilarious. A friend (ironically a guy) gave it to me as a gift some years ago. The book author also looks a bit like Richard Thomas (or John Boy - The Waltons). All hail the English language!
I am definitely adding this to my "Why Women Rock" notebook. Just so you know, the #1 on my list so far is what has inspired me to be a stronger, better woman, and that is author Dana Dorfman of "The Pink Forest". The title is what really caught my eye, but the content is so worth the read.
Funny thing: in the original story, the princess never kissed the frog.
The frog's nagging her for attention, and her parents are saying, "Oh yes, you have to keep your promise", and the frog whines to be let into bed with her, which to the princess is the last straw...
...so she picks him up and hurls him against the wall.
It's the act of defiance that transforms him from amphibian back to human, not obedience.
haha this is awesome.
totally the way they should all be. =D
funny, but i think most men now want a women who is intelligent and now just a housewife.
Ha ha ha, as a kid I had a book of fairy tales called Tatterhood and Other Tales, and they all had pretty strong female heroines. I wore that book out.