This is cross posted at my personal blog (silence-is-betrayal.blogspot.com ), but I thought it would interesting to see if my words resonate with anyone here (and sorry if it is a little ranty...I am normlly better about that).

I checked the Barometer tonight to see if my column printed this week, and to see if one of my conservative columnists, Dan Fitzpatrick, had a column in this week. To no surprise, Fitzpatrick's column was written in response to my latest , which was in response to his previous column , all pertaining to Planned Parenthood and the issue of abortion rights.

It's not that I expected to change his mind or anything, that would be incredibly naive and arrogant, but I keep hoping that I would understand him better. For those of you who don't know me personally, I am a very open-minded person who really wants to understand people, their beliefs and how those beliefs impact their life. I am curious about people and seek to understand what it is like "in their shoes" no matter how different they may be. For example, I've been known to have civil conversations with pro-life individuals despite being very pro-choice because I focus on what we have in common. I believe if we can get past the current rhetoric around the abortion issue (you are either anti-fetus or anti-woman), there is generally common ground. But as much as I have been able to do this in the past, there is this breed of conservatives, particularly those who write for The Liberty (those at Oregon State know), that I cannot understand. Whether they are spouting off gender essentialist ideals, examples of "reverse racism," anti-gay and anti-woman beliefs, promoting abstinence by shaming and limiting sexuality, etc, I don't know how to connect. To continue with the abortion issue, I can have great conversations with pro-life individuals about the need for more contraceptives and better services after birth, but this other group of conservatives is anti-condom or other birth control/barrier methods as well as sex outside of heterosexual marriage. For this, I can agree that abstinence is a great option, but to me, that's all it is--an option among others that may or may not be right for a particular person at a particular time. I will never believe that by promoting abstinence and taking away access to contracptives things will get better.

I met with a one of these extreme conservatives a few weeks ago. As a staunch Catholic, he believed that being gay was a sin, thus the need to rights like marriage and adoption. I grew up Christian so I get that the idea of being gay is a sin has been propagandized in church and has lead groups like Focus on the Family to spend millions of dollars to "defend" or "protect" marriage--a nice way of saying denying same-sex couples the same rights as opposite-sex couples. I just don't understand why this is an issue that they invest so much time and money in. They may "practice love" by being kind to LGBT individuals, but to then turn around and elect anti-gay leaders and to vote for anti-gay legislation is terrible, and all in the name of religion, in particular, Christianity. It seems like there are much better ways to spend that kind of money. Before I start ranting, you can find out more of my views on this topic by checking out a couple of my previous columns .

I just hate the feeling that there is no common ground between us. I was told when I began as a columnist that if I could piss off this group of people, it would mean I was doing the right thing. As much as I am amused by some of the hateful things people say to me, its hard to deal with the fact that we are so different that we can never take each other seriously. And it's so much more than rivalry between colleagues, but what we see played out on bigger stages. They fear that the increasingly liberal ideas about sexuality and religion are destroying our nation and the only hope is to continue with the progress Bush has made. Whereas I'm dreaming of packing my bags and moving to somewhere in Western Europe to find a more progressive home after seeing the detrimental backsteppings of Bush.

So despite the Libra in me that desires peace and understanding with the people around me, I will have to accept that there are some that I will never understand--and that will have to be okay.

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