I've only been to one bridal shower, and there were no silly games at all. Just conversation and food.

I had to plan my sister's bridal shower a few years ago and her baby shower a few months ago and I really struggled with it. Not only do I hate planning parties but I find the philosophy behind bridal showers somewhat frustrating (That being said, however, I have no problem with people who want to have them and enjoy them).

Planning the bridal shower was especially difficult because I live far from my sis. A friend of hers helped me plan it and made us plan ridiculous games that I hated. My sister's friend made it a "sex in the kitchen" themed shower (seriously!) and everyone had to bring a gift relating to the theme. I couldn't do much about it because I live in a different state and she designed and paid for the invitations.

Some of the games that I didn't find as torturous were about testing the guest's knowledge about my sister: how well do you know her? what would she do in this situation? where did the couple first meet? etc. I refused to do the make a dress out of toilet paper game; I hate it. In the end I stressed out a lot about both the bridal and the baby shower and they both came out all right. I had a difficult time putting my desires and philosophies behind those of my sister and making it something that she would want (without completely compromising my values of course). My sis is a pretty progressive and awesome lady, yet we still got in a huge fight about before each shower because I said that IF I ever get married or have kids I want a couples shower or none at all.

See if someone has a Wii you can borrow! Only four people can play at a time, but watching people attempt to box in Wii Sports sure beats the heck out of wrapping someone in toilet paper.

I was just at a bridal shower where we did the purse game. Those of us who didn't carry purses felt left out.

-Play a game where the attendees have to write down answers to questions about the bride's life. Like, what was her first job? what's her favorite movie? what does she like to read? etc. The person who answers the most questions right wins.
-A non-offensive game I've played was for one person to write a line of a poem. The 2nd's person reads that line and writes a new line, covering up the 1st person's line by folding over the paper. Therefore when the 3rd person wrote her line, she could only see the 2nd person's line. This continues on so that the poem becomes a rambling ad-lib creation. Encourage dirty thoughts.

Yes, traditional bridal showers are atrocious. Not only are they oppressive but they also reduce the bride to a child. I threw a bridal shower recently for my conservative, traditional sister... and struggled with the whole concept of it. As the guests were unwrapping gifts, her friend was writing down her "juicy" comments as things she might say on her wedding night... cause you know its all about "the sex."

We only played one "game" and it was the best one that I could find. We asked the groom a bunch of questions about them/himself, and then we asked her them at the shower. We made them funny or embarrassing... like "what is the most annoying thing he does" (which turned out to be this whole silly song that he sung to his cats) or "what is his favorite superhero"... If the bride didn't get the answer right, the guests could try to get it. Prizes for the guests who guess correctly.

But the best way too avoid a traditional bridal shower is to make it a couples shower...

We played more fun word games. Who can make the longest list of words using only letters from the couples names? Or passing out topics the couple in interested in (mine were things like hiking, yoga, martial arts, etc) and pairs of guests come up with 26 sentences about those things beginning with each letter of the alphabet. still a celebration of the couple without weird bridal stereotypes.

At my future sister-in-law's bridal shower, they had a TV couples trivia quiz. They listed twenty last names of famous TV couples (Simpson, Soprano, Cleaver, etc.) and we had to write next to them the first names of the couple and the TV show they were on. I thought that was cute because my brother is very into pop culture trivia. I am too, so of course I won. The one that I thought was sillier was "Bridal Bingo." They gave out empty bingo cards and you filled in the squares with items you thought the bride and groom would receive. If they unwrap something you wrote down, you cross it off and whoever gets five in a row wins. I just decided to screw the whole thing and wrote down deliberately weird items (lemon zester, gun rack rack, 2 chip 'n' dips).

The worst game I ever saw was on the MTV show "Engaged and Underaged." At one bridal shower, they had the bride answer questions about the groom, then showed the groom's pre-taped response. If the bride gives a wrong answer, she has to put a piece of gum in her mouth. The thing is, they use the opportunity as a joke by making the guy give different answers so it appears that the bride gets every question wrong and she ends up with her entire mouth full of gum. That's not funny--that's dangerous! Remember the girl who choked to death playing Chubby Bunny?

"Play a game where the attendees have to write down answers to questions about the bride's life. Like, what was her first job? what's her favorite movie? what does she like to read? etc. The person who answers the most questions right wins."

The success of this sort of game depends a lot on who the guests are. Relatives who are close enough to be invited to the shower but distant enough not to be involved in the bride's day to day life will be horribly left out. I know, I endured this game at my 2nd cousin's bridal shower. I spent the whole shower wishing I had a Y chromosome so I could hang out with the guys for the evening instead - they got to hang out on a boat and drink beer.

Do you necessarily have to do bride or couple related games? The best pre-wedding party I've been to we played croquet in the back yard and had a bbq and just... talked.

Ugh, this post is scaring me.

I'm going to have a bridal shower in the next few weeks given by a neighbor who is more traditionally minded than I am when it comes to weddings and marriage. I hope we don't have to play these games.

Also, I'm stealing this idea from a baby shower, but it could be fun to pass around paper and have people give anonymous advice to the bride on marriage and/or the wedding day. Then she can read them aloud.

My friend's bridal shower was also her bachelorette party and the maid of honor made it into a scavenger hunt (bride had to do a number of things by the end of the night). I'd be too shy for this, but the bride had fun with it.

Play a Maude drinking game. Grab a copy of season 1 (then after celebrations, write a nasty letter to Sony demanding they publish and distribute seasons 2-6...lol) and drink on "God will get you for that," or any number of Maudesque phrases.

I personally think that bridal showers don't have to revolve around the wedding. Almost everything does already when you're planning one, let it be a respite. And a fun night with all the women in her life.

So my shower, a bit over three years ago (before I would have called myself a feminist) was a pretty wonderful event. It was put on by some women in my church with really good taste. Food and mingling was really central to the whole thing. There were no 'games,' in part because I freaked out at the suggestion.
What they did that made it great:
-made it personal, and about me, not about weddings in general.
-while everyone was mingling, there was a book getting passed around that everyone signed with a comment for me. they wrote what they appreciated about me, about my relationship with my fiance, and about what they hoped for us together.
-when we all sat down together, everyone went around and shared what they had written, and something else they wanted me to know. Women who were already married were suggested to share something they didn't expect about marriage, or had learned since being married, etc.
-at this point in time, I was pretty religious, so this included several women saying a prayer for me. I am less so now, but I still appreciate that the shower was oriented around what I felt strongly about. So, if you're friend is religious, consider having some time for that to be a point of focus - a prayer or such. If they're not, find a way to incorporate other things that are really central to their personal beliefs into it - maybe a couple of well-chosen readings read by close friends.
I mean, that's part of what marriage or choosing a partner is about, right? Shaping your life around the people and values that are important? So I think if there are ways to make a bridal shower focus on that, rather than just on games, it can become a really meaningful event rather than just the practicing of a usually sexist tradition.

I just attended my future sister in laws bridal shower and we played three different "games." At the start of the shower we were given a toy ring and then could not say the groom's name or the word wedding at the shower. If someone caught us saying it then they got the ring(s) and the person at the end with the most rings got a prize. We also played pictionary-telephone where the first person wrote a sentence about the couple doing something and then the next person drew a picture of it. Then folded the paper so just the picture showed and the next person had to write a sentence and so on ... it was fun to come up with new sentence for weird pictures. Also they asked the bride questions about the groom .. guests wrote down how many they thought she would get right out of 25 questions person with the closest guess got a prize.

At my sister's baby shower we did something simmilar to designofgender's ring game. We had clothespins with the word baby on it and if you say the word, whoever hears you gets your clothespin. It was cute. You could do it with anything related to planning a wedding to give the poor bride a break :)

Also, we picked out beads in my sister's favorite color (you could do it in the theme colors for the wedding if the couple has them picked out) and each person put a bead on a necklace/bracelet string and said outloud a good wish for the child (you could do a toast to the couple). It was really sweet (even if it was a little cheesy) and at the end she had a new bracelet.

I say ditch the games, just have drinks and chat. Or play board games or non-wedding-related games, whatever the crowd thinks is fun. The "who knows you better" ones can stir up bad things- a best friend getting into competition with a sister, for example.

I do have one fun story though- at the last bridal shower I went to, which could have been transplanted directly from a fifties sitcom, was held at a home where the hostess had a pet parrot. By the end of the afternoon, the parrot was nonstop repeating the bride to be's fakey surprised/delighted giggle. That was the first time I felt love for a bird.

Three words: sex toy party.

(okay okay, maybe that's more suited to the bachelorette party, but I went to one and it was really fun/hilarious!)