So, I'm dating this awesome person, who is a feminist in denial (I'm working on it guys, don't worry) and we are sexually active, and use protection every time. However, I am now two days late for my period, which pretty much never happens to me. We decided that the best course of action if a pregnancy were to happen would be an abortion... but here's the bad news: I'm 17, and I live in Texas. In Texas, a minor must have a parent consent to an abortion. The good side of it is that it has a judicial bypass. The judge will grant an abortion to a minor if:
· whether the minor is mature and sufficiently well-informed to make the decision to have an abortion without notification to either of her parents or a managing conservator or guardian;
· whether notification would not be in the best interest of the minor; or
· whether notification may lead to physical, sexual, or emotional abuse of the minor.
I'd say all three would be my reasoning, but what I'm wondering is the chance that they will let me have an abortion. What if the judge is anti-choice? Could he/she refuse me? And could I get any tips on how I should present myself when I go to the court?
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Stellar: check out Jane's Due Process - they provide help for young women seeking a judicial bypass. Their phone number is 1-866-WWW-JANE and their website is http://www.janesdueprocess.org/
I hope, though, that you end up not needing it. Best of luck, and keep us posted!
Thank you, that helped me a lot.
I am not your lawyer and the following is not legal advice, but here is what I would do:
If it turns out you are pregnant, contact you local ACLU chapter and ask if they can help. In some places they have volunteer attorneys or law students who can go to court with you. And if they can't help, they may be able to help you find someone who can. I would do everything I could to get someone familiar with the court system involved as your advocate.
If you do wind up having to go to court on your own, you need to go prepared. Make a list of all your reasons that you shouldn't be required to notify your parents. Consider which would be the most persuasive to an anti-choice judge--you will want to present those arguments first. Also, practice stating your reasons before you go to court. Don't raise the pitch of your voice at the end of a sentence. Be respectful of the judge no matter what. Dress conservatively.
I'm sure others will have more advice. Hang in there and let us know what happens.
Thank you. Wow, I never thought about the ACLU... good idea! My local judge is a Democrat, though. Hopefully she's pro-choice!
A terrible situation to be in. (Incidentally, I'm late as well...much later than you, even though I used 2 forms of protection...so this post is helping me defer my own anxiety).
But, I have to ask something of the lawyers: isn't it true that if she files some sort of claim, her name will be in the court docket, which is a permanent public record (and which many courts now put online for public access)?
Oh gosh, I really hope that doesn't happen. And get a test! I already used 4, and they were all negative, but we'll see.
I would think that given that she is a minor, it won't be under her given name.
i can't really offer much advice seeing as i'm not from texas nor am i one for legal advice, but could you possibly call planned parenthood and get advice from them on how to go about getting help with doing this if possible? i do hope that you turn out to not need it. as for pregnancy tests, are you using the tests that are for detecting a pregnacy early? because those are the most sensitive/accurate for telling if your pregnant or not. early response is the name of a kind of them i believe. i'm glad i've never needed a pregnancy test yet in my life, although having to scramble to find plan B when a condom broke wasn't fun. i wish you the best of luck and hope your not pregnant but just late from stress.
Thank you, that's what I'm hoping. It's almost da four and still nothing :(
Have you tested again? Which brand are you using? Check out http://www.peeonastick.com/ for all the info you could ever care to know about home pregnancy tests.
Yuck, not a great position to be in (if you don't want to be pregnant, that is).
I know the wait is excruciating, but wait 5 more days then use a pregnancy test. I believe they are more reliable after a certain amount of time has passed.
(((Hugs)))
Oooh. I'm having flashbacks to my pregnancy scares in high school. Worst feeling ever. I don't know how regular you are, but my period will be delayed for pretty much anything: stress, a cold, the fucking weather. Hang in there because you may not be pregnant. Good luck!
Question to other commentors: if she gets legal help, will she have to pay for it?
Stellar,
If you do not feel you can confide in your parents, is there not some other person you trust, who has demonstrated wisdom or compassion for you or someone you know who could give you some counsel in this decision who does not have any other agenda but your welfare?
You are considering consenting to an invasive surgical procedure. All surgery carries an inherent risk of complication. Common sense says, 'Get a second opinion before you make what could be a life altering decision.'
Do not be rushed into a decision.
yor bro ken
I feel as if this is the only option for me, Ken. And I would have to get an abortion as early as possible to avoid complications and to keep it cheap.
It's true she should not rush into a decision, kbhvac...not only because nobody should "rush" into surgery or pills but because no one should rush into childbirth and motherhood, either.
Being a parent lasts a lifetime, and not only creates a life, but changes the lives of those already on earth...that's pretty invasive, too, wouldn't you agree?
By the way, Stellar, I only brought up the docket issue because I know I would be deeply averse to my family finding out about my pregnancy...even as an adult (for cultural reasons). I didn't want you to take some sort of action without knowing about the possibility of a public record.