While at the bookstore today a book in the etiquette section caught my eye (the etiquette section appears to be located next to the home decor and knitting sections... I wonder why?).
It's called Debrett's Etiquette for Girls by Fleur Britten . Ah yes... more ideological pap wrapped up in a glossy package and reiterating the same old stereotypes of what a 'good' woman should be/act like/look like.
The front cover comes complete with a headless woman with cleavage in the midst of eating an oyster, in yet another fantastic example of using woman's body as an object.
Category headings like "Man Management, " "Image Management" and "Social Graces" just reinforce the same old stereotypes of what a 'proper' woman should do, how they should act in regards to a man, other women and society in general.
This gem comes from the 'Man Management' section, sub-section 'Flirting': "A little purr can only increase your bargaining power" (p. 118).
Um.. excuse me? Now, not only am I being commodified, but I gain power over men by acknowledging that fact?
But what bothered me the most? There is an equivalent book out there by the same publishers called Debrett's Manners for Men: What Women Really Want .
Of course... so now we're 'girls' who need to act in a certain way to be considered ladylike and it is assumed that this is what men want- yet the 'men' are accorded the respect of the word 'men' (not 'boys') and then they get the manual to spell out what we are supposed to want.
(As a note, I have nothing against etiquette or manner's in general at all! I just hate the exceedingly gendered application these rules seem to take.)
How do these books still sell? Who buys them? Sometimes I just want to become a full-time hermit and ignore all of this junk.
/end rant


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We have two main bookstores in my city. One has a fairly decent women's studies section, although for some reason it is located right next to the home decor section.
The second bookstore, I looked everywhere for a women's studies section; when I asked an employee where it was, she replied "the what section?" I then had to explain to her what women's studies was. They had about four books, which for some reason were right next to those books that tell loser guys how to score with women.
But yes, I am wondering if the publisher does not see the power differential between having a book for "girls" and one for men. I would be willing to bet that they do.
Oh, I'm sure the publisher's do! Mainly because women will still buy a book even though the word "girl" is in the title, whereas men (I assume) would most likely not!
I'm happy I'm not the only one pissed about that book. Why would women buy a book that talked down to them and didnt even refer to them as women?
True. But vagina does have a common usage referring to the whole of the female genitalia, just as penis refers to a specific part of the male genitalia but also has a common usage referring to the whole. For example, I automatically thought of the inclusion of bedroom furniture the scrotum in Velvet Acid Christ's question about drawing a penis on her or his car.