I was at my English lit class yesterday morning, and since it really isn't very big, we were having a discussion on the final few chapters of 'To Kill a Mockingbird'
My Professor asked us what Scout meant by saying that she had finally learned what it meant to be a woman, and the guy next to me raised his hand, and said "Cause she finally stopped acting like a dude."
I, of course, took immediate offense to that, and called it out as sexist, reasoning being that there is no set way to be a woman, or a man. He of course, turned to me with a shocked look on his face and yelled "I am not sexist!"
Then my friend Sam and I got into a huge argument with him over why expecting females and males to act in certain fashions was sexist, not really stopping until he ammended his comment by saying "She finally started acting like what a lady did, back then "
As I left and hour or so later he screamed at my retreating form "I am not sexist!"
Yeah, which is why you try to build up your muscles in order to seem more 'manly' and get seriously offended if someone breaks the traditional gender roles. (Including marrying/dating those of the same sex, which is a completely different topic)
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Not to disagree with your larger post -- because I do think, from the way it sounds, like he was engaging in sexist talk in this instance, and opposing same-sex sexuality or romance is undoubtedly sexist -- but building up one's muscles in order to be bulkier (or healthier) isn't, in my opinion, a sexist act, nor is it a sign of one's being sexist.
If he explicitly said it was to be more "manly" -- and didn't say it ironically, as I could imagine my saying it -- then that might be sexist, but the act of doing weightlifting in order to increase muscle mass isn't by itself sexist.
I think she did mean the comment about muscle-building in the context of, he thought it would make him more manly, otherwise she would not have said it because it would have served no purpose in any other context.
reasoning being that there is no set way to be a woman, or a man
Gender theorist believe that gender is a social construct... right?
And that there are instances where males and females act in accordance with the construct, in fact they make sure they do so... so they are 'doing gender.'
For a male, the line of reasoning would be "I was born with a dick, everyone else born with a dick does Y, I am going to do Y"
Or
"I was born with a dick, only people born without a dick does X, I am going to make sure I don't do X"
So, it does seem that there are ways to conform to gender constructs, be a 'man or a woman' in your words... so why was the guy sexist for pointing that Piper had started to conform to the social construct determined by her birth?
Because that is all he did, just in layman's terms.
Just because society creates standards for masculine and feminine behavior doesn't mean they hold any merit. These standards are arbitrary, unique to individual cultures and harmful to everyone. By claiming that certain behavior is ladylike or manly, we are telling those who do not behave this way that they are not women, or are not men. Because these standards are related to culture, they are often used to dehumanize entire groups.
There have been many threads about the use of feminine speech and behavior patterns, but if you analyze them, they are simply white American middle-class behaviors. Black women (generally) speak much more assertively than white women. Women from the Mediterranean are more comfortable touching others than white American women. Calling these behaviors un-feminine is strip these women of their womanhood, and with it, their humanity.
There is a difference in acknowledging the existence of phenomenon (a positive statement) and stating that phenomenon is the way things should be (a normative statement).
It looks like the OP and her friend jumped the guy over a positive statement, and one that may be true (its been a while since I have read To Kill a Mockingbird).
If the OP reacted to her classmates statement as a normative statement, when by her account is seems to be a positive statement, then she put words into her classmates mouth and made a claim that appears to be unfounded.
Look at my comment. There was not one normative statement. But it seems like your comment was responding to a normative statement I did not make. I did not say conforming to gender constructs was good or bad, I stated how a hypothetical male would 'do gender' without stating if doing gender was good, bad, or dependent on the situation.
But after her derogatory about muscles I can't wonder if maybe the guy isn't the one who is sexist.
It's been about 10 years since I've read Mockingbird, but I think that, while it could have been phrased better, he was on the point. All of the troubles Scout had gotten herself into to were attributed, in her mind, to her acting unlike a Lady, in the cultural sense. She was a tomboy, and finally realized the troubles she was getting herself into about it -- if I remember correctly, it resulted in her breaking her arm.
As a major theme in the book is group's power over the individual, I wouldn't think your classmate's claim is too over the top given the context I remember. I'll need to reread it (which I should anyway).
Perhaps this is something which comes with being a guy, but I would have had the same reaction at being accused of being sexist. His analysis, while not well stated, doesn't necessarily mean he's a sexist or holds sexist views, just that he views the statement to carry weight which implies a sexist theme within the text.
I always took that comment to mean that she was seeing things as an adult and not a child, not that she used to think like a "dude".
Working out and correctly interpreting the obvious meaning behind a book written almost 50 years ago that takes place about 708 years ago are now the epitome of sexism.
I am having some problems interpreting what you mean, maybe there is a typo in there, the events of To Kill a Mocking Bird did not take place 708 years ago.
Was that suppose to be 70 years ago?
What? How could you forget the memorable scene where Scout and Jem meet the Holy Roman Emperor Rudolf II? It's a literary classic!
:-)
No need to be mean.
They were not being mean, it was a joke; not the kind that pokes fun at you but the kind that is meant to be cute.
Right. It takes place during the Great Depression of the 1930's. I meant to say 70.
Yes, obviously. TKAM takes place during the Great Depresion of the 1930s.
I think people often forget how much weight terms like 'sexist' and 'racist' carry. I had a similar experience with a professor talking about how he was worried he'd have no one to take a visiting writer out to dinner since it was superbowl Sunday, but then he remembered a few female professors who were around that weekend... I consider that a 'sexist' remark, assuming women are automatically uninterested in something like the superbowl, but I tread lightly on calling the man a 'sexist' professor. Maybe because I'm too hesitant, but maybe because I wouldn't want my whole person to be defined by a single stupid comment (of which I've made plenty). The student was probably defensive at the idea that he was being called sexist (which isn't to say he isn't; I don't know him), vs. what he said being a sexist remark. Not sure if that helps, but I think it can be an important distinction when trying to debate a point with someone who becomes defensive.
I agree. I find that when you call someone a racist or sexist, it shuts down conversation. I always try to emphasize that what was said or the action taken was itself racist/sexist and not necessarily the person undertaking it. Most times I find that the person in question isn't so much sexist/racist as they are just ignorant and in need of enlightening.
I agree too. the difference between saying someone is sexist and what they did is sexist is often overlooked.
here's a short flick that explains it well in terms of race.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0Ti-gkJiXc