So reads the final line of the introduction to the interactive "joke" used as a promotional tool for "Obsessed," which opened in theaters yesterday.

For context, here is the paragraph preceding "Don't worry, it's only a joke:"

"Now it's time to put your friends in harm's way... that is to say, as the new object of Lisa Sheridan's affections.  Simply upload their photo, give us some tasty info, and we'll do the rest."

The interactive site, "Get OBSESSED With Ali," does exactly that: you give them a photograph and a handful of details about your friend and they insert them into the pre-made stalker-template message, replete with the language associated with stalkers' communication to their victims.

In 2000 the National Violence Against Women Survey found that "[stalking] is more prevalent than previously thought: 8.1 percent of surveyed women and 2.2 percent of surveyed men reported being stalked at some time in their life; 1.0 percent of women surveyed and 0.4 percent of men surveyed reported being stalked in the 12 months preceding the survey.  Approximately 1 million women and 371,000 men are stalked annually in the United States" (Shaw & Lee, 428).

According to the Stalking Resource Center, stalking is generally defined as "a course of conduct directed at a specific person that would cause a reasonable person to feel fear" (Stalking Fact Sheet).  As discussed in "Stalking Victimization in the United States," Supplemental Victimization Survey (SVS), funded by the Department of Justice Office on Violence Against Women, measured the incidence of particular behaviors associated with stalking: "making unwanted phone calls," "following or spying on the victim," "leaving unwanted items, presents, or flowers," "sending unsolicited or unwanted letters or e-mails," "waiting at places for the victim," "showing up at places without a legitimate reason," and "posting information or spreading rumors about the victim on the internet, in a public place, or by word of mouth" (Baum, et. al, 1).  Though each of these acts, individually, don't necessarily amount to criminality, "collectively and repetitively these behaviors may cause a victim to fear for his or her safety or the safety of a family member" (ibid.) 

Here are a few facts (from Stalking Resource Center's "Stalking Fact Sheet"):

"1 in 12 women and 1 in 45 men will be stalked in their lifetime."

"87% of stalkers are men."

"59% of female victims and 30% of male victims are stalked by an intimate partner."

"30% of female victims and 20% of male victims sough psychological counseling."

"The prevalence of anxiety, insomnia, social dysfunction, and severe depression is much higher among stalking victims that the general population, especially if the stalking involves being followed or having one's property destroyed."

"Intimate partner stalkers frequently approach their targets, and their behaviors escalate quickly."

Despite the fact that stalking is so prevalent and so potentially dangerous, the general public discourse surrounding stalking makes light of it.  Remember the "Some call it stalking, I call it love" t-shirt sold by Wal-Mart?  Or the line, "Are you stalking me, 'cause that would be super," from the 2002 film "National Lampoon's Van Wilder"? Or Kathy Bates' character in "Misery"?  Each of these representing only the tip of the iceberg, particularly when the incidence of cyberstalking is considered; "[approximately] 1 in 4 stalking victims reported some form of cyberstalking such as e-mail (83%) or instant messaging (35%)" (Baum, et. al, 1).

Not only does the interactive "Get OBSESSED With Ali" site perpetuate status of stalking as a crime that deserves less-than-serious consideration - remember?..."it's just a joke" - it also perpetuates the stereotype of the crazy, obsessed, FEMALE stalker.  Thank you Hollywood, for regaling us with yet another tale of the obsessive woman; as if "Misery," "Disclosure," and "Fatal Attraction" weren't enough, we now have "Obsessed" character Lisa Sheridan.

As Jessica Valenti points out in He's a Stud, She's a Slut and 49 Other Double Standards Every Woman Should Know , the same behaviors could be exhibited by both a man and woman, but he's considered to be romantic and she's the psycho stalker (58).  What about the character Edward from the popular Twilight book and film series? Kelsey Wallace, in her piece for the Spring 2009 issue of Bitch , briefly examines creepiness of Edward's relationship to Bella, his love interest: one of the hot selling Twilight -themed items is a t-shirt that says, "'I just like watching over you.' When Edward utters that line in the film, he's referring to his habit of following Bella around without her knowledge, even watching her sleep from outside her window. Some would call this stalking.  Tweens call it a cute shirt" (Bitch No. 43, 24).  This, and other morbidly, "creepifying" merchandise inspired by Twilight , is selling like hotcakes; never mind that it blatantly demonstrates Edward's penchant for stalking and an obviously abusive tendency, he's just being ROMANTIC.  Were the same utterance to come from Bella to Edward, there would be a social uproar about her being a stalker.

This double standard, particularly highlighted by the United States film and television industries, is reaffirmed and re-presented by films like "Obsessed."  The incredibly disturbing promotion at "Get OBSESSED With Ali" also reaffirms the double standard in the cultural imaginary, while simultaneously making light of the seriousness of stalking and its affects upon victims and survivors.  But "[don't] worry, it's only a joke."

For more information from Stalking Resource Center (including “Stalking Victimization in the Unites States” and “Stalking Fact Sheet”):

http://www.ncvc.org/src/main.aspx?dbID=DB_statistics195

To check out the hideousness of "Obsessed" promotional tool "Get OBSESSED With Ali":

http://getobsessedwithali.com/

For more information on Wal-Mart's "stalking" t-shirt:

http://consumerist.com/consumer/in-poor-taste/walmart-stalking-t+shirt-angers-stalking-victim-305284.php

http://www.feministing.com/archives/007832.html

Other Sources:

Shaw, Susan M. and Janet Lee. Women’s Voices, Feminist Visions: Classic and Contemporary Readings . 2nd Ed. New York, NY: McGraw-Hill, 2004.

Valenti, Jessica. He's a Stud, She's a Slut and 49 Other Double Standards Every Woman Should Know . Berkley, CA: Seal Press, 2008.

Wallace, Kelsey. "'Twilight' corner: Your merch is like a drug to me." Bitch 43 (2009): 24.