Last night, for various reasons, I found it difficult to get to sleep. And, in the way that can happen from time to time, I remembered a conversation I had at home one evening with my brothers. I had said to them that I was keeping my name upon my getting marrried next year. Why would I do that, they asked? Because I was a Feminist, I explained. Well, slap me silly if they didn’t wonder why.
A feminist! Why on earth do I consider myself a feminist? Surely we wimmin all enjoy a life of equality and delight, now that legislative rights have been accorded to us. What on earth would I have to campaign about? What was there to complain about, now that us lucky ladies were permitted to speak, etc?
Even now, it strikes me as amazing that grown up men with all their faculties can wonder as to why a woman would be a feminist. The immediate response I want to give is that I am a feminist because I have a brain. However, this admittedly reductionist response can be expanded upon.
I am a feminist because for generations, stretching back through history, women were second class citizens. This systematic slavery managed to survive independent of the intelligence, social status, or moral character of any men who came across it. No matter no morally good a man might be at any time or place, the view of women as ‘lesser’ was accepted. It was not fought against, argued against, or even debated. Women were less than men, and that was that. This impregnation of idea that existed in cultures, therefore, is something that must be fought against and argued about, again and again, so that the innate corruption of reality can be exposed and revealed for the prejudice it is.
Another factor is that I was raised a Catholic. That wonderful bastion of intellectual tradition declared me and my sisters lesser than any and all men. This lesser status was mostly in the way we made decisions about our own bodies, but starting from St Paul and reading onwards, the doctrine and tradition classed us as lower beings. That, and the fact that the Lord our God, the creator of all around us, the alpha and the omega, who could destroy the world with His thoughts, was impotent, when faced with the sacred emptiness of the uterus. All could be brought to the altar and make bread and wine into flesh and blood of Christ on the cross, except women, due to the fear of the Father had of all of us. Daft nonsense that had travelled throught the years, and had been swallowed by all those compliant pale-faced men, was being used to trap women into the belief their own God would judge by gender.
Finally, it is because of my witnessing my mother’s life, and the sheer daftness she was obliged to put up with, followed by moments clearly illustrated by the attached link. I wish to be as I am, not as the world would have me be and so I am a Feminist. It is a matter of amazment to me that anything else would be chosen; why would a person willingly choose slavery?
http://www.amptoons.com/blog/the-male-privilege-checklist/
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"Even now, it strikes me as amazing that grown up men with all their faculties can wonder as to why a woman would be a feminist."
even grown up WOMEN with all their faculties can wonder as to why a woman would be a feminist.
... unfortunately...
nice article...
xLx
Your comment reminds me of something: I remember pointing out BITCH magazine once to a customer at the bookstore I worked at. She thought the title was funny, and I explained to her that it was a feminist magazine. "Oh, I'm definitely not a feminist" she said to that.
EXACTLY! I can't tell you how many women I come across who couldn't care less about feminism. Heck, I even have many intelligent, educated friends who say "I'm not a feminist, but..." It's really beyond me. Feminism is one of the best things that has ever happened to me so it's just hard to understand.
I absolutely LOVED that male privilege checklist. It's also mindblowing that many men, inparticularly MRAs argue against many of its points, even when statistics prove them.
Your points on the strangely gender-obsessed god of Catholicism (and frankly, judeo-christian religions in general) are spot-on.
I am all for spirituality; I think it is a beautiful thing. But the current popular organized religions will forever be a thorn in the side of proper rights for all until their powers are diminished from society.
For even if some can find the positive and inspiring in their source of scripture, these sources are also rife with sexism, racism, homophobia and wanton violence and there will always be those these things to attack and/or restrain the rights of others.
This is wonderful! My brother does the exact same thing...only hes just the tip of the iceberg. One whole side of my extended family thinks I'm absolutely crazy to consider myself a feminist...and, yes, that does include female relatives. I cannot make it through one family event without someone making a crack at my self-identification as a feminist...or my religious beliefs...or my lifestyle. I cannot figure out how they can't see the world the way I do! I try to explain to them the inequalities I see, and they refuse to see it! It might be because they're very traditional and conservative Lutherans. Thank GOD I dug myself out of that indoctrination...
I understand your frustration totally. On the note about religion (I'm a lapsed Catholic as well), there's pretty convincing research that sheds a different light on the meaning of many of the texts in the Christian gospels that discuss sex and gender--that are in a feminist viewpoint's favor. I dont have the books I've read on this offhand but plan to blog about it soon in detail. But essentially, word meanings have changed in time and with different translations so many things are misunderstood. And the way we understand it now doesnt take into consideration the cultural context.
btw, i also wrote a guest post on rotten little girls about why i became a feminist. it's part 5 of their series. anyone can contribute so if youd want to elaborate more on this or guest post there, you should email them.
www.dancingbackwards.com
I think the context of this story- about changing your name upon marriage- is very interesting. Some of my friends are getting married soon, and the topic has come up in conversation. My engaged friend (who has decided to hyphonate) warned me:
"guys get REALLY REALLY UPSET if you don't want to change your name."
Really? Well that's too bad for them. I told her, "well, I wouldn't marry someone who got upset about that." She scoffed (literally scoffed. I don't think I've ever used that word before!). I said, "well seriously, it's their issue to be upset about. It's YOUR name, you can do what you want with it."
The conversation made me wonder why women put up with the stupid ideas of men, and go out of their way not to "upset" them.
But I have never seen name changing (or lack thereof) as a feminist issue. I see it as a logical, practical decision. This is how I view so much of feminism and any other ism- they defy LOGIC. Why wouldn't a woman change her name? Because it's HER name. Because it could be a bureaucratic nightmare. Because it represents HER family and culture. A host of other logical issues.
So the feminist issue is not why a WOMAN would change her name, it's WHY A MAN WOULD CARE.
Seems like such a common problem in "feminism"...