We've all seen the constant debate on educating. Is it worth it to teach the sexist guy the basics of feminism and why it matters? Is it useful to post a trans 101 post on this site to educate cis women? The list is endless.
The general agreement seems (to me) to be that it's not the oppressed group's job to educate the oppressor, and I think that's absolutely correct. However, it makes me sad to see the conversation stop there.
Just because it's not your responsibility doesn't mean it's not a good thing to do. Respectfully laying out your position can be the difference between having a somewhat ignorant ally willing to learn or a resentful enemy resolved to write you off. No one has an innate knowledge of things that are unfamilliar to them.
I understand getting tired of playing that role, I really do. I'm not saying that anyone is a bad person for not having the desire to go back over 101 bullshit, especially if it seems like the person you're talking to is resistant. But I do think we underestimate the value of taking the time for individual education. It really can make a difference, sometimes right away but sometimes slowly.
So, the next time you see someone being offensive and you get the feeling it's out of fear and ignorance not just pigheaded bigotry, if you can, take the time to change someone's mind.
Anyway, that's my not-so-deep thought for the year.
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Umm, so it's not the oppressed group's responsibility to educate people but they should do it anyway because it's important?
You're right, it wasn't that deep.
*sigh*
I don't know what's more offensive - that you made this post or the justifications you use within the post.
Let's start with the latter (and less egregious offense). Please continue to educate because it can change minds. Whoa! Have you got any more cutting edge wisdom you can share? Maybe on the discovery of fire? News flash: marginalised groups know about the importance of personal education. "we" don't underestimate anything so speak for yourself when you're speaking for yourself. Actual oppressed groups live it every single day and, guess what, we're actually not stupid. We continuously weigh up the desire to educate against the draining and frustrating experience that it is to have to listen to ignorant insulting and othering language everyday. You don't 'understand getting tired of playing that role', you don't have a clue. You haven't lived my life, you haven't had my experiences. As such, I, not you, am the best judge of when I will and will not educate.
And secondly, here's my 'deep thought' for the day: the next time you feel the need to write posts prescribing behavior to other marginalised groups, just STFU. Seriously. You have no right to start explaining to other groups how they can and cannot behave. This post is appalling: othered groups don't want the 'encouragement' of privileged groups to continue serving their needs.
Here's a radical idea: control your own behavior, check your own behavior, worry about your own behavior. Check your own privilege and then just STFU. You are not here to police my community, you are not here to police my behavior, if people don't wanna teach you then they won't.
We get that it's important, we get when its necessary and we'll do it when we feel that it's the right thing to do. You don't understand the frustrations, you don't understand our experiences and you don't have any right to prescribe behavior.
So why don't you just go back to derailing threads by asking off topic questions, sharing your irrelevant experiences and refusing to google stuff. And then I'll post snarky responses that elucidate your utter stupidity. And all will be well in the land of feministing.
^what pololly said...
:|
Everybody on this site always wants a 101 post. If its not about young, white, straight, middle class, cis women, then its "we don't understand! explain! 101 post please!" There's google. There's blogs. There's books. Information is not hard to find.
When the Angie Zapata trial was going on, people here were calling for a 101 post on trans issues because they couldn't understand.
This Saturday, professor foxy answered a question about asexuality. Commenters, OF COURSE, once asked for a 101 post.
Here's a tip for you. Open your browser window.
Go to google. Type in "[issue] wikipedia". Not hard.
I don't understand the level of anger and hatred displayed by this post. I can understand your feelings but not taking it this far.
I am also completely flabberghasted as to why you say: "the next time you feel the need to write posts prescribing behavior to other marginalised groups, just STFU. Seriously. You have no right to start explaining to other groups how they can and cannot behave."
Huh??? Isn't the poster part of the same group as YOU? How is she not part of the same group. Unless I'm missing something.
I can understand some frustration, but overall it was a harmless post on a community blog that is only trying to help feminism. This poster probably is now alienated from the community and may decide to give-up helping as a result. I don't see how that's a good thing.
This poster used the 'male/female' example as a cop out. All of the 101 debates over the past few months have been on trans, race or other issues. The OP hasn't even got the balls to address the real issue and honestly admit that she is trying to guilt other marginalized groups into her own agenda.
I notice she hasn't come back to defend her oh so deep thoughts. If all of these poor privileged posters spent as many posts doing the research as they did defending their right to not do research it would no longer be an issue.
And feminism is pretty weak indeed the OP is the best it can do.
So, we shouldn't call people on their crappy use of language and tell them why it's bad?? If we don't do it, who is going to?
Actually we can. But if that person wants to argue and derail another conversation, and then write posts defending their right to argue and derail, I'm giving up and getting back to the subject at hand. People like the OP feel that no one on feministing has the right to have a conversation which doesn't exclusively revolve around them.
And of course, they continously play the victim. Wait for the OP to post back how pearl clutching about how hurt and upset she is in 5,4,3,2...
You know, thanks. I'm actually trying to write an Asexuality 101 post after the debacle of the last Professor Foxy post, and it is so so so difficult. It's not "being tired of educating", it's that educating ignorant people hurts, that the offensive comments hurt. I spent a large portion of Saturday crying because of the comments on that post, and now I'm going to go dissect my life and experience so that people can make yet *more* ignorant comments and I probably get to spend a large portion of the day I post it crying? And that's not even going into how bloody difficult it is to write one of these things; I have no idea whether I should address the derailing arguments to make clear why they are derailing, or dismiss them in order not to give them legitimacy, I keep having to catch myself and not write about the issues that I find really interesting (asexuality and queerness, asexuality in the sex-positive movement, asexuality and disability...) and keep it at a *gag* 101 level because it's not as if people can manage to be respectful or deal with semi-complex material if they're not hand-held through it... and no matter what I do I'm probably going to get tone argument'd to a fare-thee-well because how *angry* I am is clearly coming through.
And, you know, I'm still doing it, because I think it might be worth it. But if someone is going to come in and tell me I *should* do it because zomg education zomg allies zomg, I will probably bite their heads off.