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Contemplating the Word "Bitch"

I started thinking about this today, and decided to do a little "research" into the subject. Mostly, how people define the word on Urban Dictionary.

One interesting thing I noticed is that the word is often used to describe a guy who's "whipped," someone who will do whatever his girlfriend tells him; oddly enough, the word is also used to describe a woman who, among other things, refuses to do what her boyfriend - or really any guy - wants her to do.

For example, it seems acceptable to call a woman a bitch if she won't put out after a guy buys her dinner, a movie ticket, or even a drink. Yet if a guy has sex when his girlfriend wants it, not only is he a bitch, but she is arguably a bitch for taking control.

Where did this sudden contemplation come from? I dumped a guy recently, because I wanted to be single - no, I needed to be single, because I found myself being too dependent on being in a relationship and I needed to let go of that crutch - and his friend gave me all sorts of grief for hurting him and dumping a nice guy. As if women are somehow obligated to date every nice guy they meet. Because I took control of my life, did something for my own emotional well-being, and by doing so broke someone's heart, I'm a bitch.

There seems to be an angel/bitch dichotomy. Either you're a nice girl who puts everyone first, does nice things for others, lives to please those around you, is never rude, hardly ever rejects a guy, etc. - or, if you don't live up to these standards of what makes a good girl, you're a bitch. If you do anything that displeases anyone, you could be called a bitch.

I don't want to ramble on or bore anyone, but there's more on my thoughts here

Posted by RebelArtemis - August 17, 2009, at 08:52AM | in
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8 Comments

[0+] Author Profile Page kandela said:

Well a 'bitch' is literally, specifically, a female dog. So when it is applied to a person it is meant as an insult. I would say that when applied to a man it is more the 'female' part is what is meant to offend, whereas when applied to a woman it is the 'dog' part that is meant to offend.

For women the insult has a 'catch-all' quality, so that it can be used for anything. You needn't be thinking about what anyone means by it.

Personally, I don't use the term.

[0+] Author Profile Page Kate said:

I think it is very interesting that "bitch" is applied to a women when she is being strong, independent, self-confident, etc--traditional qualities of masculinity. On the flip side, "bitch" is applied to a man when he is being weak, insecure, or needy--traditional qualities of femininity.

I think it is very interesting that "bitch" is applied to a women when she is being strong, independent, self-confident, etc--traditional qualities of masculinity. On the flip side, "bitch" is applied to a man when he is being weak, insecure, or needy--traditional qualities of femininity.

Exactly what I was thinking.

Interesting little dichotomy there.

[0+] Author Profile Page Kate replied to sangetencre :

It seems to me that it is becoming a word for people stepping outside their expected gender role more than anything.

[0+] Author Profile Page Marj said:

You've summed up why I consider 'bitch' to be a compliment. As a woman, it's usually used to describe qualities I'm proud of having.

[0+] Author Profile Page PDXHopeful replied to Marj :

Yep, and it can be hilarious to see how people react when your response to being called a bitch is a brilliant, megawatt smile and a 'Thanks!'

[0+] Author Profile Page Spiffy McBang said:

"Yet if a guy has sex when his girlfriend wants it, not only is he a bitch, but she is arguably a bitch for taking control."

If you've really heard anyone use it in this specific way, my mind is officially blown.

[0+] Author Profile Page Femanon replied to Spiffy McBang :

a man is "the bitch" if he's dominated, but a girl's a bitch if she takes control. not just in a relationship, in any situation.

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