I'm sure this is all too common a thing, but I today I saw a bumper sticker that made me feel weird in a way I'm not sure I can describe. The sticker was on a pick-up truck (ever the gendered "male" vehicle if there was one) and it said in large type: "I LOVE MY WIFE."
Oh, OK, that's nice. It immediately made me feel odd. Was this more like those stickers that say "I (heart) my X breed of dog" or maybe more like the ones that proclaim pride in the honor roll child?
Isn't the assumption that one would love one's spouse? It just struck me as a whole "wife as property" thing...of course I might be reading too much into it.
What do you think?
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I think you've jumped the snark.
I've seen those too and I'm pretty sure they're from the Promise Keepers, a conservative Christian group for men. Anything related to that group gives me the willies, frankly.
http://bumperstickers.cafepress.com/i-love-my-wife?cmp=knc--g--us--lib--sticker--e--i_love_my_wife_bumper_sticker&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_term=i+love+my+wife+bumper+sticker&utm_content=search-e&utm_campaign=lib--stickers+-+us
http://bumperstickers.cafepress.com/item/i-love-my-partner-sticker-bumper/18019017
http://bumperstickers.cafepress.com/i-love-my-husband_flair
These are the PK ones I'm talking about:
http://tiny.cc/Jnm6X
I think any and every decalaration of love, for children, dogs, spouses, home towns, big cities (I heart NY)
is a good thing
I wish for more love declarations of love, not fewer. While i can stretch (even as a feminist, for me it's a stretch) to see your point-
I disagree.
love love love and spread it all around, maybe it's contagious.
And I am not a hippy or a Beatles fan.
Was there a web address on it? If it was from a anti gay organization or fundamental organization then it likely have a name or web address on it.
I've never seen the bumper sticker your talking about. But if it wasn't from a hate group, then its likely was just a romantic thing between partners. There are also "I love my husband." or "I love my child/son/daughter" bumper stickers. They just seem like a cute, (but annoying to other people) family memes.
*has not have
Without knowing fully, I'd say it's rather nice. If/when I have a spouse, I'd like to declare my love on a bumper sticker. I think it'd be nice.
It may be one of those family values stickers, but without really knowing, I'm going to take the rose-tinted glasses approach.
I can see where you're coming from, but I think it depends on the person who put the sticker on the car. I knew a het 2 car couple that put "I love my wife" on one car and "I love my husband" on the other, then regularly drove around in the car with the sticker that matched their gender just for fun (ie: she drove the "I love my wife" car).
Also, when I was last in Provincetown, I noticed an explosion of these stickers in rainbow colors. :)
I agree with everyone saying that it seems harmless. I don't see anything wrong with a plain bumper sticker saying that you love someone. It doesn't offend me the least. In fact, it does the exact opposite for me: it gives me warm fuzzies.
I think, if you look at this a certain way, it can seem pretty cool from a feminist perspective. A lot of big strong men with huge trucks would see a bumper sticker talking about lovey-dovey things as an embarrassment to his manhood. But he doesn't seem to. :)
This strikes me as a lot better than the people who have the names of family members put under the car windows, like assigned seating or something.
I suspect it's just a lovey-dovey thing. A cute, if tacky, sign of affection.
My dad had one of these bumper stickers for a while. It's cute and all, but it was heavily Christian based for him since it was from Promise Keepers and I honestly am not a big fan of Promise Keepers. Never really been sure why I'm not a big fan of them, I guess I'm not a fan of dudes sitting around trying to become better family men while at the same time trying to deny women basic reproductive rights on their Christian front. So I dunno. I kinda agree love for your wife should be kinda implied (but I also think love for one's dog should be a given to but whatever), but the stickers are harmless enough. I didn't mind inheriting that sticker when I got his car. I did mind the "Got Jesus?" sticker he'd plastered on the rear view window, but the I Love My Wife I didn't really mind. So *shrug* dunno, lol.
I think your first reaction is dead on-- the guy is a creep, bragging about being straight and sending code to other Christian patriarchs of their own households.
I'm straight, but I just bought a rainbow sticker for my car. I'd definitely like to park next to the 4X4 man you mentioned!
"bragging about being straight"
seriously? is it flaunting my heterosexuality when i date or fuck men?
"sending code to other Christian patriarchs" is the creepy, not the straight part.
Feminism isn't about hating men. Didn't you get the memo?
I don't hate men; I absolutely reject reading that bumper sticker out of context.
It is a Promise-Keeper-pride sticker, and the PK's are homophobic and sexist patriarchs, and I'd be afraid to be that man's wife, because "love," defined by the PK's is treating women like they are helpless dependents. My husband loves me, and I love him, but I would never flaunt our legally sanctioned union in front of a group of people who are not able to marry. If you asked Mr. 4X4 whether he thinks that two men or two women who love each other should be allowed to call each other "husband" or "wife" and enjoy the legal privileges of marriage, I bet he'd say, "God created Adam and Eve and not Adam and Steve."
It's a stealth message, and that is why MiriamCT1 posted about the uneasy feelings in the first place. It was right to let people know about it.
Who said it was a PK bumper sticker? I'd think the OP would have mentioned that. Are all of these bumper stickers (love my husband, love my partner) bad, or just the "wife" ones? You guys are making a lot of assumptions from the "gendered" vehicle. "Mr. 4X4," for all you know is a happily married woman. If the OP's going to indulge in stereotypes, lesbians are said to love pickup trucks. Crimmeny.
I think that this bumper sticker is wonderful and I'm literally appalled that you think this guy is somehow a creep for having it. I would love it if my husband had a bumper sticker like that or anyone else for that matter. Love is the best thing in the world, don't take it for granted.
I'm sorry but I feel very strongly about this. It seriously disturbs me that someone would think this guy is a creep for having this. I'm completely dumbfounded right now.
I see where you're coming from, but to be fair, I saw a bumper sticker probably a year ago now that said I (heart) my husband. Honestly, I thought it was more funny than anything. I mean, who, with a completely straight--no pun intended!--face, would put a bumper sticker like that on a car?