I was standing in line at the checkout today and a mother and her daughter, who as about 9, were behind me. The daughter was looking at the magazine & tabloids on display.
Daughter: Why do they have all these women in bathing suits on the cover? Are they famous?
Mom: Yes, they're actresses.
Daughter: But why are they putting pictures of them in bathing suits on the front?
Mom: Because they're talking about how skinny or fat they are. [pause] Actresses have to be very, very thin. It's a horrible situation. Women are made to become very skinny to be actresses. If they're not skinny, they don't get good jobs or they get no jobs at all. It's a very bad expectation and it's going to change.
I was so happy to hear this mom say this to her daughter. I remembered when I was a chubby, short kid and told my mom I wanted to be a ballerina. She answered that ballerinas had to be very thin and tall. She wasn't trying to hurt me at all, but I wish she'd followed that up by explaining to me that these standards were the problem, not me and my body.
Anyhow, this was the best experience I've ever had in a grocery store check out.
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I like it, but the fact she said that actresses *have to* be very thin kind of irks me. A lot of actresses aren't- it's just the Hollywood starlets.
I would've turned around and said, "But if you want to be an actress, don't let a number on a scale stop you! You'll be hotter than any of those women!"
yeah well unfortunately that is the beauty standard that hollywood sets. Its not right but its there and I think we all need to remember that when we talk about things like this. But I am so pleased to hear that mothers are saying these kinds of things to their daughters. Go mom of the nine year old in the grocery store!
"It's a very bad expectation and it's going to change. "
Awesome!
I like that the mother responded frankly to her daughter's question. If I had asked a pointed something in a tabloid/magazine at the grocery line to my mother, she would have quickly "shooed" me away from them (probably because she didn't want to get into a conversation about what "sex tips"/"flat abs"/etc. meant) And of course, that made me want to read the "forbidden magazines" even more...
I like that she didn't bring up healthy vs unhealthy or talk about the percieved attractiveness of the actress (relating to weight) Feminist mum in action!
And she did so without even mentioning the word "feminism."
This again shows one does not neccesarily have to self-identify as a feminist to have feminist thoughts/action.
See? You can have feminist teachable moments, even at grocery stores! And they say being a homemaker or women's work is worth nothing!