I had never realized how easy it is to destroy your own body image; your own self-worth. I realize that the article I want to talk about is several years old, but I felt the need to share this. I’ve spent the last little while trying to slowly build up my own body image and come to terms with my curves. I watched all of Huge. I listened to angry girl music. I downloaded Rubens paintings.
Today, I was looking for some more pictures to add to my collage. I google searched “plus size women” and “role models.” This was my first mistake. My second mistake was clicking on the link. I should’ve read the blurb. I should’ve known better. But what I found was this.
(Though this isn’t a typical triggering subject, I warn anyone who has had serious body image difficulties in the past to approach this article with care).
After reading it, I was shaking with anger. I went out into the living room, sat down on the couch and burst into tears. Everything I’d built up over the last few weeks was gone. I couldn’t even look at myself in the mirror. “I’m disgusting, I’m disgusting, I’m disgusting” chanted the voice in my head. My boyfriend listened to my story. He told me the article was crap and the woman was completely out of line. He hugged me, kissed me, and told me that I’m beautiful. I feel a little better now, but I know I’m going to go into the bathroom to get ready for bed, and I still won’t be able to face myself in the mirror.
8 Comments
Well.
I thought the article was actually quite well argued. The author is stating truths: being overweight is unhealthy.
OK. OK. OK – maybe the message is unpopular and not pleasant to hear, but the truth often is unpleasant. But no matter how loud people shout, the truth it remains.
Does anyone seriously dispute the author’s assertions?
Bear in mind that America leads and the world follows. The article is in an English newspaper, and it is warning England that if it is not careful, the English will soon suffer the same problems appearing in America (OK, USA): diabetes in young people, heart disease, etc.
Anything that can open people’s eyes is to be welcomed.
I call bullshit on your statement, this article is not well worded, it’s simply hateful nonsense. If you somehow think that referring to someone as fat and lazy is an argument, you’re sadly mistaken. When I look at this person, I see a beautiful woman. I don’t see a single roll on her bulging obscenely out of a pair of pants or a swimsuit. BMI is only a number, that often has no bearing on someone’s health, god forbid some people really are a healthy size 16, and it really shouldn’t make a difference as to their role model status.
If these supposedly well-wishing ‘health conscious types’ really cared about the quality of role models, then where is the outrage over a pageant finalist who chain smokes or drives drunk? Why do we turn a blind eye to those people in public who make destructive decisions that effect society? (Perhaps there is no chain smoking finalists or drunken driving finalists, I don’t know, but there certainly are celebrities in America that do these things frequently) Because its not about public safety, or making the world a healthier place, it’s about people tearing down someone’s self-esteem because they were personally irked by the sight of a 17 year old ‘fat’ girl (A put fat in quotes, because I really am not seeing this supposed fatness) boldly relishing in all her beautiful glory.
So yes, I seriously dispute the author’s statements, because I honestly am doubting that one plus size model in a beauty pageant is going to bring about the downfall of an entire country by making fatness fashionable (Whatever the hell that even means), by somehow enforcing her evil ‘fat-agenda’ on young women who were just sitting around waiting for the day that an overweight person would come along on TV and give them permission to jump into the nearest lard bucket and start chowing down. There isn’t anything compelling or intelligent about a judge who claims that young girls are being pressured to overeat in order to fit larger beauty standards because she didn’t see anyone who appeared to be underweight (Where is her almighty BMI now?) , or that having a ‘muffin top’ spilling over your jeans is somehow an indicator of one’s health and not that they’re wearing pants that are too tight.
HilaryCS I agree, it is entirely too easy to destroy one’s self esteem in this society that perpetually feels the need to interject with their ideas of what is healthy and what is beautiful, but seems to be miraculously absent when it comes to compliments and encouragement.
What I found challenging was the way the article conflated the idea of overweight and obese. Essentially the argument was: this contestant is overweight, obesity is bad and we should not encourage a fashion of obesity. It is therefore a logical fallacy to say that the contestant is a poor role model.
It was also interesting to see the way the article relies on bmi, which is useful as an estimate, but has several limitations as a measure, including an inability to take into account a naturally stocky figure.
@smiley: please be respectful when it comes to body image issues. Eating disorders are also unhealthy, and you have no way of knowing how your comment could affect others who read it.
@Hilary: the contestant in question is gorgeous; don’t doubt yourself
The article is a pile of judgmental douchebaggery. It doesn’t matter if it draws on factual points, it’s argued in a mind-numbingly demeaning way that should have that writer doing five to ten in a Mickey D’s.
I’m planning on reading the article soon, but as of right now, regardless of what it says, I want to tell you that you are most certainly not disgusting, and I know how it feels to have a hard time looking at yourself, I’ve struggled with an eating disorder when I was younger. An important thing you should remember is your confidence needs to come from within yourself. There will always be people in the world who will try and make others feel bad about themselves, and you can’t change them, only they can change the way they behave. But you can work on yourself and how you feel about yourself. It seems clear you’re already doing that, just don’t give up because you’re hurt right now. Also important to remember: you are much more than what you look like, and there are many more important things about yourself to value, try not to internalize the sexist media that promotes unhealthy body image and objectifies women. Confidence is about more than being okay with how you look, it’s about accepting and loving who you are as an individual.
On a slight tangent: I know that there are a good number of awesome fat acceptance sites around now which provide a lot of support. Is there an equivalent for people who are unhappy about their bodies in other ways (i.e. they consider their facial features to be highly conventionally unattractive)?
It’s also great to see someone who is considered to be ‘overweight’ to be a Miss England finalist, but where are the role models for people who are considered ugly in other ways? Beauty is still the benchmark here and we’re still being told that if your face isn’t up to scratch in a conventionally beautiful way, you’re not welcome.
I am eighteen and I am overweight. The problem with this article is that it’s insensitive and flat out rude. The girl is beautiful. She might not be a size two, but she has a flat stomach. The author addresses the idea of girls starving themselves as a thing of the past, but why does it have to be one extreme to the other? So what if a girl is not starving herself to be thin? What if she is waking up every day of her life and hating herself because articles like that are written and published? What if she wakes up hating her life because she is constantly being compared to skinnier girls? Those are problems that women, overweight or not, face every single day. There is not a formula for beauty and there shouldn’t be one. There should not be a reason for me to calculate and obsess over everything that I eat. Women should not be forced into thinking that there is a mold for beautiful. What happened to individuality? What happened to women feeling beautiful? Articles like that one make me sick.
Urgh. That article is complete bullshit. And you know why? It’s in the “daily fail.” Online publications just want hits and they’ll say anything to get you to click.
Ultimately, the joke is on author. There’s a size 16 beauty queen because–shocking! Most women aren’t size 2! Most women look like Miss England!
So, hahaha, on the author. You love every one of your curves!