Random question before i get started: is there a way to link my blog with the feministing community blog? I’m new to this whole blogging thing….
So the actual blog can be found here, and so far that’s my first post but there will be more to come. So here it is…
Ok, so admittedly I am relatively new to the whole twitter scene. I started using it at the beginning of summer, but it’s easy to catch on quickly. So i get that most people use it to say what they’re doing from day to day, where they’re at, who they’re with (great for stalkers, btw). Some people use it to put up pictures or stay connected with friends who live far away. And some people use it for news, new information, and disseminating ideologies (gods i hate that word.. disseminate. How masculine-identified can we get, here?). I like to use it for all three (though i have yet to post pictures… i need a smartphone for that.. Santa?). Lately though there have been some really interesting hashtags and trending topics..
This whole #IHadAnAbortion thing is getting a lot of attention. Is it trivializing abortion? Is it breaking the silence? debates go on. Personally, I think it’s brilliant. Us younger generations are using social networking sites to break silence and spread information (& combat intentional MISinformation) like crazy. To assume that just because it’s on twitter it’s being trivialized shows a lack of understanding of youth culture and how we use technology, specifically social networking sites. The fact is, abortion isn’t talked about, and when it is it’s usually talked about by people who’ve never experienced it. I’ve written about this before (scroll down a bit).
So WHATEVER vehicle we are using to bring it up and have women speaking from experience is a plus in my world view. True, you cannot hold a lengthy dialogue via twitter. But you can post articles, links to blogs, etc., where you CAN go into more detail about it. Plus if nothing else you can bring it up with friends “oh hey i saw this tweet about abortion” and BAM, the space is open for dialogue, assuming it’s not brought up in an unsafe way that closes the possibility of someone “coming out”.. which is also an inevitable and unfortunate possibility. I’m not saying tweeting about abortion is perfect, but it’s a damn good start. And I for one am VERY proud and inspired to read what these young women have to say.
Other trending topics have caught my attention. A couple weeks ago there was one #WhatWomenReallyWant. Today it’s #ThingsWomenDontDoAnymore. I haven’t seen too many trending topics about men. And I wonder if it was a man or a woman who started these. My guess is a man. because men LOVE to talk about the reality of women, because our narratives are.. what? untrustworthy? Or for some reason they just know better. Some of these are REALLY sexist. Most, actually. I added my two cents with : “most of the stuff under #thingswomendontdoanymore are REALLY sexist. Oldschool, tired rhetoric around rigid gender roles. #getoverit“… which i’m sure got overwhelmed by tweets such as:
#thingswomendontdoanymore cook, clean, bake … Learn to take care of urself and man!
#ThingsWomenDontDoAnymore , hide the fact that they strip… They brag about it
#thingswomendontdoanymore stay at home and be mothers … all you scrapes think its ok to be in the club weds-sunday.. lookin fo yo next bd
*sigh*…. these next ones i found very interesting:
#thingswomendontdoanymore try to be GOOD because they scared to recognized as a LADY. They want to be seen as a, and i quote “Bad Bitch”
#thingswomendontdoanymore act like ladies in the streets
#thingswomendontdoanymore Act like women….
#thingswomendontdoanymore behave like ladies
#ThingsWomenDontDoAnymore stick with one dude. Being a “player” isn’t cute.
Really… it hurt my head at first. But then I have to take a step back and realize most people never stop and even question what a woman is supposed to be like or what a man is supposed to be like. It’s been so normalized and the silence around these issues makes them invisible. I’m not upset that people feel this way… I’m upset that systemic sexism makes this acceptable. If being a lady means playing nice all the time, smiling, being polite, cooking dinner bla bla bla, i’d MUCH rather be a “bad bitch”… even though i have a feeling being a bad bitch is, in most cases, merely internalizing masculine qualities. But hey, it’s one form of resistance, and i dig it. Same with being a “playa”… no, it’s not cute. and it’s not sexy when men do it either but hey, it’s the only way some women know how to level the playing field. it all speaks to the male norm. We are a masculine – cenrtric society. (Pretty sure I just made that word up, but just go with it). Male standards are the norm. So if a woman wants to get ahead she must internalize typically male qualities (being assertive, aggressive, stoic, etc). And thats what we see a lot of the time from women who reject femininity and the passive, quiet, nice role associated with it. So if a girl wants to get ahead, how can she do it without being a “bad bitch”? All these gender experts should hash that one out.
Some of the tweets were funny, and some were even going against the grain.. ish:
#thingswomendontdoanymore eat!! yall bitches needa step yall weight up
this was honestly the first thing I thought when i saw the trend. Women don’t eat anymore because we’re told to take up less and less space. #femtheories haha
#thingswomendontdoanymore take shit from men.
oh how i wish this was true. But the fact that many people posted things like this shows a trend in female independence at least. Even though many women DO take shit from men and depend on them, i don’t think 20 years ago it would be a tweet… assuming there was twitter… you getting this?
#ThingsWomenDontDoAnymore Be Housewives. That’s wassup!! ShoutOuts To The Independent Ladies!
if by independent you mean have a husband, a kid AND a fulltime job.. yeah go independent overworked super stressed out supermoms. Ok i’m being snarky. But there’s truth there.
and the one that caught my attention the most, it gets my vote for favorite tweet of the day (so far):
#thingswomendontdoanymore stand united..they all try to bring each other down..wasn’t always like that.
And while i think that it HAS always been like this, i believe it’s gotten worse. So now i’m wondering how can women come together as a collective (across age, race, nationality, etc) via social networking?
my musings for the day….