Do you want to know what rape culture looks like?
It looks like a world where you blame women. Where you ask: “What was she wearing?” “Where has she been?” “How many men has she slept with?”
Where one the first things asked after hearing about a sexual assault is “how much was she drinking?” “And what did she do?
When you do all those things and you don’t do one of the simple things that can prevent rape.
You don’t ask men and boys to stop raping.
So what kind of world do you get?
You get a screwed up place where one out of every three women will be sexually assaulted in her lifetime. Where most rapes and sexual assaults are not reported, fewer are prosecuted and fewer still result in the perpetrator paying for their crime. A world where, for many women, there is no justice. No point in telling family and friends, let alone the authorities.
Do you want to know what rape culture looks like? It looks like shame, loneliness and ostracism.
It looks like a world where a seventeen year old girl is pushed to take her life after being assaulted, ignored by law enforcement and tormented by her community.
Do you want to know what rape culture looks like? Read Rehtaeh Parson’s father’s letter responding to his daughter’s death. Or read the countless articles each year about the voiceless and faceless statistics of the women, girls and boys who are assaulted, blamed and silenced.
Think about that the next time you call a young girl or woman a “slut,” “whore,” or “ho.”
Think about that the next time you ask questions that blame the victim instead of demanding non-violence from men.
Think about that. Because that is what rape culture looks like.