Oh what a miserable man are you
Just shut your mouth for a second or two
You think yourself so droll
but really you’re just an asshole.
Despite your romantic line
of “Oh, baby, you’re so fine,”
I swear it to be true,
I will not sleep with you.
I deserve to be treated better,
even in no pants and a tight sweater,
because no matter how I look,
your words make you a crook.
You steal my sense of safety,
my ability to walk around care-freely.
Your appalling lack of respect
must be some sort of defect.
What would your mother say
if she knew you were behaving this way.
I hope she would say, “Cut off his dick,”
then maybe you would stop being a prick.
I doubt this poem will change your fucked-up mind,
but keep your lecherous eyes away from my behind.